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It's time to fish or cut bait. You've been putting that bait out there for quite a while, apparently, and have nothing to show for it but a lot of empty hooks.

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He's not biting. You need to make it clear to him, in terms that are easy to understand and that have no wiggle-room for the worm: "I can't do this anymore. I you, and I can't keep sleeping with you and going through all the motions of having a relationship, and then stand by while you now try on-line dating. If you don't think we have a future, then I need to get on with my life.

What's the worst that can happen? You might be lonely for a little while as you re-enter the dating pool. Is that so horrible?

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What's the best that can happen? He realizes that he's been playing fast and loose with someone he cares about and shapes up?

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Based on something in one of my magazines, which I don't remember the name. Uses pork shoulder, but is easily adaptable for vegetarians via beans and textured veg protein: 3 lbs pork shoulder, cut into 1" cubes cup chopped bacon 1 cups chopped onion chiles, chopped, to taste I used 13 habaneros. This is lethal. Cook the bacon until it's crispy, set aside.

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Drain off most of the fat save itthen brown the pork in it, set aside again. Add some fat back in, saute the chilis, onions, and spices until they start to brown. Then add the garlic and brown sugar, saute a little more.

Then add everything except the beans, cook low 'n' slow until tender and done, scrape the bottom of the pot periodiy. This takes maybe 90 mins or so, depends on the meat. Then add the beans and heat through. Serve with sour cream, shredded cheese, avocado, sions, chops, whatever you like. If you do go the fire alarm route with habaneros, have lots of ventilation going on! And who knows, maybe safety goggles too. Wish I thought of that. Naughty fun horny adults!